As I traveled home for Thanksgiving break, I thought a lot about lenses. We've talked about looking at different issues through different lenses- someone who is knowledgeable about a culture versus someone who is not. Part of my experience at AU has been sharing my "culture" (or experience, at the very least) and learning about others. One thing that has come to the forefront is the idea of rural versus urban.
At AU, I have been experiencing an urban setting with a rural background. Of course, I've been to cities before, so it wasn't like seeing buildings was something new. Compared to the rest of the country, I don't even live in a very rural area. Yet, I felt like my rural identity was something I had to latch onto and talk about at AU. Considering all the issues facing agriculture and rural communities that are often overlooked, I felt like I had to bring my experience to the table.
Yet, my train ride home and the first few days felt the same as being at AU; I was someone with a different lens. There wasn't anything specific, but something felt weird. I approached traffic the same way I do in the city. I locked my car in the driveway as if someone would try to break in. Driving the winding mountain roads at 60 miles per hour felt dangerous (honestly, it is, but it didn't use to feel dangerous). I forgot that we got milk and eggs delivered on Wednesday mornings.
It wasn't until we went to cut down our Christmas tree that I felt at home again. The trees and the grass are all brown. There are little piles of not-quite-melted snow on the side of the road. The sun started to set at 3pm. I was wearing a hand-me-down flannel jacket (lumberjack style) and muddy boots. I got covered in pine sap and dirt, and it didn't bother me half as much as getting a scuff on my shoe from the metro. But I don't think this side of me would mesh in DC.
I've thought a lot about identity. I have this rural identity that I like to bring to the table for a broader range of views, but I don't bring all of it- I pick which parts work best. I think we all do this, but I wonder how it affects conversations, interactions, and politics. Of course, we only want to talk about what's relevant, and what helps make our case, and it's impossible to bring all of our identities at once to any conversation. Still, I find it weird, even though it's within my control, that most people don't know that I grew up watching my step around chicken poop and shooting guns in the backyard. It feels like something to be ashamed of when I'm living in the city, but should we really be ashamed of our experience and lenses?
At AU, I have been experiencing an urban setting with a rural background. Of course, I've been to cities before, so it wasn't like seeing buildings was something new. Compared to the rest of the country, I don't even live in a very rural area. Yet, I felt like my rural identity was something I had to latch onto and talk about at AU. Considering all the issues facing agriculture and rural communities that are often overlooked, I felt like I had to bring my experience to the table.
Yet, my train ride home and the first few days felt the same as being at AU; I was someone with a different lens. There wasn't anything specific, but something felt weird. I approached traffic the same way I do in the city. I locked my car in the driveway as if someone would try to break in. Driving the winding mountain roads at 60 miles per hour felt dangerous (honestly, it is, but it didn't use to feel dangerous). I forgot that we got milk and eggs delivered on Wednesday mornings.
It wasn't until we went to cut down our Christmas tree that I felt at home again. The trees and the grass are all brown. There are little piles of not-quite-melted snow on the side of the road. The sun started to set at 3pm. I was wearing a hand-me-down flannel jacket (lumberjack style) and muddy boots. I got covered in pine sap and dirt, and it didn't bother me half as much as getting a scuff on my shoe from the metro. But I don't think this side of me would mesh in DC.
I've thought a lot about identity. I have this rural identity that I like to bring to the table for a broader range of views, but I don't bring all of it- I pick which parts work best. I think we all do this, but I wonder how it affects conversations, interactions, and politics. Of course, we only want to talk about what's relevant, and what helps make our case, and it's impossible to bring all of our identities at once to any conversation. Still, I find it weird, even though it's within my control, that most people don't know that I grew up watching my step around chicken poop and shooting guns in the backyard. It feels like something to be ashamed of when I'm living in the city, but should we really be ashamed of our experience and lenses?
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